Pregnant Widow 

Pregnant Widow

Well, there’s more than meets the eye… when the pregnant widow walks on by

There’s lots of whispering in town…when the pregnant widow comes around

Don’t get your knickers in a twist

Don’t get your testes in a fix

Messing around, pants come down

Pop your dress right off

Shame on me, shame on you

Shame we had to stop

It’s in the Bible, but we’re liable to forget ourselves

She’s a slut, and I’m a nut

And we’re both going to hell

You know something isn’t right…when the doctor’s in…

Read more

Souvenir From The Wilderness 


Here's a new tune of mine, "Souvenir from the Wilderness."

Written last winter during one of the meanest spells of seasonal blues I can remember, I polished it up recently as a way of processing the sad news of Anthony Bourdain's and Kate Spade's passing.

Now before you start worryin' yer pretty little heads about moody ol' PV, trust that I love rocking your world too much to ever think of leaving it.I followed my muse down a dark and lonely road. But I came…

Read more

The Way I'm Wired 

The clutch is slipping, and the coolant’s low

And when you hit fifty you can really feel the road

The warning light is on, but it might be broke

And when you put your foot down you’re smelling smoke

It’s just the way I’m wired

It’s just me being real

Trying to wrap my head around a new steering wheel

It’s just the way I ride

It’s just the way I roll

Two wheels in the ditch, but I’m almost home

It’s just the way I’m wired

What once was shiny is looking pretty beat up

And on a hill like this, getting up to…

Read more

My Escape 

I went running down the hill

I went running and I ran so fast I almost fell

I dove into a lake

I’m no swimmer, and I barely made the other side

But I was finally on my way

On my way to making my escape


I heard the howling, and the cries

I thought about potential alibis


I flew deep into the woods

Barely off the ground, like a broken kite I’d found

All twisted up and turning

Every single muscle burning

But it felt good to be on my way

On my way to making my escape


And I, I heard the stars explode


Read more

Something I Learned From Jesna Today 

Something I Learned From Jesna Today



Something I learned today

Black and white is always grey

Looking through the window pane

I’m not inside your brain

Something I learned today

Never look straight in the sun’s rays

Letting all the sunshine in

Can’t remember where I’ve been

Can’t remember where I’ve been

La-la-la-la, la-di-da

Something I learned today

Always yield to the right of way

Stopping at a four way sign

Someone else’s rules, not mine

La-la-la-la-la-la, la-di-da

Read more